Sunday, April 20, 2008

Pope's Mass
Pope Benedict XVI celebrated mass at Yankee Stadium Sunday. After the game the Yankees traded him for two bishops and utility infielder.

After the Pope delivered a homily dedicated to peace and understanding, the crowd seemed to understand; responding with applause and only a few shouts of "Mets Suck!"

Giuliani Takes Communion
Former Mayor Rudolph Giuliani received Communion at yesterday's Papal mass at St. Patrick's Cathedral despite the fact that Giuliani has been divorced twice and favors abortion rights. The Church later clarified that it only bars Communion for Democrats who have been divorced twice and favor abortion right.

Black Baseball Players
A new report shows that only 8% of Major League Baseball players are African-American. Apparently steroids are hard to find in black neighborhoods.

Patrick Wins One!
Danica Patrick became the first female winner in IndyCar history today, taking the Indy Japan 300 after she was the only driver willing to ask directions.

China Protests
Chinese protesters have been targeting French-owned businessed in Beijing in response to French protesters who disrupted the Olympic Torch relay in Paris. So now the Chinese and the French are fighting each other... you gotta love it when a good plan comes together.


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