Jersey Extracted
Construction workers jackhammered through concrete yesterday to pull out a Red Sox jersey from the base of the new Yankee Stadium. The bodies of the 15 former union officials also in the foundation were not disturbed.



CBS Journalist Released
CBS says it's "overjoyed" by the release of reporter Richard Butler, who was kidnapped in Basra in February. CBS is even more overjoyed by the fact that the terrorists were willing to trade him for Katie Couric.



Clearing the Air
Beijing is halting construction and development city-wide in hopes of cleaning the air in time for the summer Olympics. But without any new cemeteries, where will the government put all the murdered protesters?



Buyout Offer
Blockbuster is reportedly trying to buy Circuit City... mostly so it will have some company when it goes to bankruptcy court.

Blockbuster is reportedly trying to buy Circuit City... proving that Blockbuster executives never learned that two wrongs don't make a right.



Hillary Bashes Obama
Hillary Clinton says that Barack Obama's comments about "bitter" small-town Americans "elitist, out of touch and frankly, patronizing"... and if Obama tries to steal her speech writers again, she'll throttle him!