Musharraf Speech
In an emotional speech, Pakistani President Gen. Pervez Musharraf today stepped down from his position as army chief. He teared up as he realized that from now on, when he wants to kill someone he'll have order someone else to do it.

Musharraf Speech II
In an emotional speech, Pakistani President Gen. Pervez Musharraf today stepped down from his position as army chief. And that's understandable... where else in Pakistan is he going to find such colorful outfits?



Bush Aide Quits
President Bush's top political adviser, Al Hubbard, is resigning today. Hubbard wants to spend more time with his family... as soon as he can afford the gas to get home in the first place.


Dead Donations
An analysis of political donations shows that more than 160 dead people have given more than $540,000 to candidates for the White House and Congress over the past eight years. It's actually easier for dead people to donate... they don't have to worry about the consequences.


FINALLY, something that explains the Ron Paul campaign!



Red Cross CEO Canned
The American Red Cross is dismissing CEO Mark W. Everson, citing his "personal relationship with a woman who wasn't his wife"... which wouldn't have been such a problem for the Red Cross if that woman hadn't been a vampire.



FCC Bid Fails
The FCC Chairman's bid to bring more regulation to the cable industry failed miserably yesterday as most of his fellow board members rejected the idea. They would have gone along with the idea, but they were too busy begging their cable companies to give them the NFL Network.