Arabs Join In
Several Arab countries will be attending the Israeli-Palestinian peace talks in Annapolis this week to help bolster Palestinian confidence. And joining the talks to help bolster the Israelis will be three Jewish cardiologists and an accountant named "Murray."

Representatives from Syria, Saudi Arabia, Yemen and Sudan will be at the peace conference... so the world can be reminded of how great it is for everyone when Arabs get their own states.

The Israelis are reportedly ready to again offer the Palestinians their own state and even parts of Jerusalem. The Arab countries are reportedly willing to stop killing Jews on alternate Tuesdays.


Cyber Monday
America is gearing up for the online shopping event known as "Cyber Monday." That's when millions of us save time and money by buying pants that don't fit us.

Nearly 75% of online retailers will offer special promotions on this "Cyber Monday." The other 25% are offering dancing kitten screen savers.


Black Friday Numbers
Initial reports show that the traditional "Black Friday" sales far exceeded expectations, finally putting to rest worries that wiser American consumers might threaten Chinese jobs.

The higher Black Friday sales numbers are being attributed to "pent up" consumer demand for electronics, winter apparel, and toys that won't actually kill you.

The higher Black Friday sales numbers are being attributed to "pent up" consumer demand for electronics, toys, and something else to do with their lives other than line up in front of a big box store at 3am.