"I Wanna Be Back-Dated" (lyrics by Jake Novak)

Sung to the tune of “I Wanna Be Sedated” by The Ramones

Twenty-twenty months since our stock hit its low… I wanna be back-dated
My salary and bonus ain’t enough oh no, I wanna be back-dated
Just get me my own airport, buy me my own plane
Hurry hurry hurry, because I can complain
I control the board, I control their brains
Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

Twenty-twenty months since our stock hit its low, I wanna be back-dated
Do it real fast so Spitzer won’t know, I wanna be back-dated
I need to buy a cruise ship, I got children to be fed
Options pay me when I’m living, they pay me when I’m dead
The market’s always moving, but I can always win
Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

Twenty-twenty months since our stock hit its low, I wanna be back-dated
My salary and bonus ain’t enough oh no, I wanna be back-dated
Just get me out to Davos, I’m the CEO
Match the competition, or out the door I go
I control the boardroom, I run the whole show
Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I wanna be back-dated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I wanna be back-dated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I wanna be back-dated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba I wanna be back-dated