Foley's Past
Mark Foley's claim that he was sexually abused as a teenager by a clergyman has angered many victims of sexual abuse who say that being victimized is no excuse for victimizing others.... but it does teach you some really good moves.

Condi's Message
Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice flew into Baghdad Thursday to press Iraqi leaders to resolve their differences and ease raging sectarian violence that has killed thousands.... or at least take out their aggressions on liberal reporters back in the U.S.

Paris Punched
Paris Hilton is saying that she was punched by Shanna Moakler, a former Miss USA, during a nightclub fight... thus making Shanna Moakler the new most popular woman in America right now.

Jen & Vince Kaput
Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn have broken up. It turns out Aniston is still more in love with Brad Pitt and Vaughn is still more in love with Bratwurst and Old Milwaukee.

Wiretap Ruling
The U.S. Court of Appeals has ruled that the Bush administration can continue the warrantless surveillance program while it appeals a ruling that the program is unconstitutional. Of course the Bush administration already knew about the ruling last week that because it bugged the court's phone.

Guns for Teachers
A Wisconsin state lawmaker is suggesting arming teachers, principals and other school personnel as a safety measure. And in most cases, the students can teach the faculty how to use them.