Giambi Steroids
With Yankees star Jason Giambi admitting to a grand jury that he's taken steroids, baseball fans are losing their faith in the game. Now the only way to be sure you're watching athletes not taking performance enhancing drugs is to follow the Mets.

Top Five Places Jason Giambi Hid his Illegal Steroids

5) Sammy Sosa's bat

4) Shawn Green's Yarmulke, (Oy! If only he wore one)

3) Curt Schilling's real ankle bone, (wherever that is)

2) Nomar Garciaparra's jock, (plenty of unused room in there)!

1) Right in the box seats at Shea Stadium, (trust me, nobody ever sees you there)

Homeless Experiment
Teenage members of a Church group in the Berkshires will learn what it's like to be homeless by sleeping outside in boxes this Saturday night. Unfortunately, this is the Berkshires, so real estate agents are already looking to put the boxes on the condo market starting at $375,000 each.

Female Viagra
The FDA is considering approving a patch that acts as a so-called "Viagra for women." The patch actually doesn't do anything to boost the female sex drive, it just sends a message to a woman's brain convincing her that the man she's with really will call her in the morning.

Overseas Degrees
Studies show more and more American students are attending universities overseas to save on tuition and enjoy a foreign culture. Actually, the most popular reason for spending your college years abroad is you get a good jump on avoiding the draft.

Drug Plans
Several new health plans are offering "no limits" on prescription drugs, but only for seniors. Of course, there is a place where younger Americans can turn for no limits on their drugs, it's called "college."

Powell Haiti
Armed gunmen traded shots with guards while Secretary of State Colin Powell visited Haiti's presidential palace in Port-au-Prince yesterday. Well, at least Powell got a warmer reception than President Bush did in Canada.