Internet Anniversary
40 years ago today the first message was sent over the Internet. It was: "Hey, where's all the porn!"



Angry Muslim Wife
A New York City Muslim woman has been arrested for trying to slit her husband's throat after he tried to get her to eat pork. If a Jewish woman's husband tries to serve her pork, she makes him take her to a better restaurant.



Job Scam
It turns out that the White House has been incorrectly inflating the number of jobs created by the $787 billion stimulus plan. The Obama team says it made the mistakes because the cost of a government-bought calculator is $788 billion.



iPhone Perv App
There's a new iPhone app that let's you know if there's a registered sex offender in your vicinity. Of course if you're looking for someone who has never had sex of any kind, just look for the people standing on line to buy the new iPhone.



Cheaper Halloween
A new report shows that most Americans plan to spend less this Halloween. In fact, all of Steve Phillips' girlfriends are going to share the same Princess Leia costume.



Airline Cuts
US Airways is cutting 1,000 jobs, most of the laid off workers are hoping to get new jobs selling laptops to pilots at Northwest Airlines.





October 30th


1270: The Eighth Crusade ends by an agreement between Charles I of Sicily, the sultan of Tunis, and the ratings-challenged Crusader Television Network.


1938: Orson Welles broadcasts his radio play of H. G. Wells's The War of the Worlds, causing anxiety in some of the audience in the United States... but not as much anxiety as the guy who once ate Welles' last donut.


1995: Quebec sovereignists narrowly lose a referendum on declaring independence from Canada. Like most Americans, Quebecers realize it's just easier to ignore Canada altogether.