Ben's Wisdom
During a town hall in Kansas City last night, Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke said the lessons learned from our recession will help make the economy stronger... China's economy.


Ben's Fears
Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke says he begrudingly okayed the big bailouts last year because he wanted to avoid another Great Depression... and he really didn't want to see a remake of "The Waltons."



Census Mistakes
A review of the 2000 U.S. Census revealed that the count was actually too high. Census takers are defending the overcount, rememinding everyone that it's hard not to count each customer at Krispy Kreme as at least three people.



Comic Con Ends
This year's Comic Con was the best-attended sci-fi/fantasy event ever... which means hundreds of thousands of single guys are about to return home to find their parents have rented out their rooms.



Sarkozy Mishap
French President Nicolas Sarkozy was released from the hospital this morning after he collapsed while jogging. His doctors are advising him to drink more liquids, get more rest, and schedule a trip to the U.S. as soon as possible so he can be treated at a real hospital.




July 27th

1663: Britain passes the second Navigation Act requiring all goods bound for the American colonies to be sent in English ships from English ports... this includes illegal aliens from Mexico hiding below deck.


1694: A Royal Charter is granted to the Bank of England. Than Bank immediately applies for a taxpayer bailout.


1953: Korean War ends, but no one realizes it until the final episode of M*A*S*H airs 30 years later.


1974: The House of Representatives Judiciary Committee votes 27 to 11 to recommend the first article of impeachment against President Richard Nixon for obstruction of justice and excessive jowls.