Teen Workers
For the first time ever, most American teenagers are not getting jobs this summer. Well, it is hard to compete for a job at McDonald's when you're going up against an illegal with six kids back home.


"N-Word" Funeral
The NAACP symbolically buried the N-word Monday. From now on, black and white people are being urged to just say "MotherFu**er!"

"N-Word" Funeral II
The NAACP symbolically buried the N-word in Detroit Monday. And since it was held in Detroit, they were then forced to bury seven of the people at the funeral who were shot for real.



The "M" Word
British Prime Minister Gordon Brown has banned ministers from using the word "Muslim" in connection with the terrorism crisis. Brown does not think these nearly fatal attacks are any reason to make fun of al Qaeda's still-failing diversity hiring programs.



Bush Says No
President Bush has invoked executive privilege to deny requests by Congress to learn more about the firings of federal prosecutors. He's also not going to tell Congress some other vital information, like most of them are fat and that Nancy Pelosi's facelift makes her look ridiculous.



PlayStation Price Cut
Sony has cut the price of the PlayStation 3 by $100... allowing most of its users to finally buy toothpaste, soap, and a clean t-shirt.


Wonders of the World
In an online vote, the Great Wall of China was voted #1 "wonder of the world." For thousands of years, it continues to keep out invaders, vandals, and food quality inspectors.



Iraq Vote
Senior Iraqi officials are now calling for a no-confidence parliamentary vote against Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki. But it's not clear if they have no confidence in his political abilities or if they just don't think he's going to live until Wednesday.