Ugly Race Ends
John Corzine has won New Jersey's long and bitter governor's race. Now, if people in the state want to see scum and mud slinging, they'll just have to walk the streets of Newark.

Bush Effect
Many GOP candidates are quietly blaming the Bush for their poor showings in yesterday's elections. This is actually a step up for President Bush, who usually gets blamed for screwing up the whole country.

Bad Omens
Experts say yesterday's election results weren't the first signs of trouble for the Bush administration... it's just that the media didn't realize the significance of all the bad reviews for "The Dukes of Hazzard" movie.

Chalabi Visit
Iraq's Deputy Prime Minister Ahmed Chalabi is in the U.S. this week to meet with Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and Treasury Secretary John Snow. Chalabi will visit Rice to discuss the future of Iraq's government, and he'll visit Snow to pick up his paycheck.

French Problems
The French riots are being seen as the result of a nation where the people haven't been able to accept rapidly changing religious, racial, and ethnic changes. Others blame it on a government that is basically still pro-Nazi.

Cheney Losing Bush?
Sources say Vice President Dick Cheney is loosing his influence over President Bush because of the CIA leak scandal and the continuing war in Iraq... but other's say it's mostly because now Bush is basing more of his policies on what he learns from watching Clifford The Big Red Dog.

NYC Art
A new art exhibit in New York displays 22 skinless corpses under glass. Spineless corpses have been on display at the City Council chamber for 35 years.

Terrell Apologizes
A day after the Philadelphia Eagles cut star receiver Terrell Owens for the rest of the season, he publicly apologized for his behavior. Experts believe Owens is finally doing the right thing because he's now being counseled by Brett Favre's lawyers.

Top 5 Things Terrell Owens Can Do to Get Reinstated

5) Get those damned Campbell's Soup commercials off the air

4) Help the U.S. war effort in Iraq by joining the insurgents

3) Do something about Randy Moss' hair

2) Blame it all on Judith Miller

1) Stop blocking our view the next time Nicollette Sheridan drops her towel

Dad's in the Way
Actress Jessica Alba says she is willing to do a nude scene, but her father is holding her back. Mr. Alba may be the one man in America who now needs more secret service protection than President Bush.

Shar's Plea
Shar Jackson, who had two children with Kevin Federline before he married Britney Spears, says she will not sue him for child support and that she just wants Federline to spend more time with their kids... but why should the children be punished?

Pirate Defense
The crew of the luxury cruise ship that was attacked by pirates last weekend used a sonic weapon that blasts beams of ear-splitting noise to ward off their attackers. In other words, Ashlee Simpson was the on-board entertainment.