CBS Pulls Ads
CBS will no longer air three ads from Miller Beer, saying the ads make claims that "cannot be substantiated." No word yet on whether CBS will apply the same rules to the Evening News with Dan Rather.

Top 5 Shocking Plot Twists in the New Harry Potter Book

5) 500 pounds of marijuana "discovered" in Hufflepuff House

4) Hermione drops out of Hogwart's, feels much more comfortable at Mt. Holyoke

3) Evil Lord Voldemort tripped up this time by income tax evasion indictment

2) Harry's Quidditch team disqualified for steroids

1) Harry learns new spell to protect himself from Michael Jackson

Holiday Time
Millions of Americans are busy decorating their homes for Christmas... but you should know that the FDA has just released a study that shows that putting up trees and hanging mistletoe can increase your chances of heart disease.

Alleve Warning
Now the FDA is warning Americans that the over-the-counter drug "Alleve" may also cause heart disease and stroke. But experts say that taking over-the-counter drugs is still less of a strain on your heart than trying to pay for prescription drugs.

Bush Backs Rummy
President Bush says he's going to stand by Donald Rumsfeld and keep him as Secretary of Defense... but the FDA now warns that doing so could increase the President's chance of heart disease or stroke.

FDA Warnings
It seems like every day, the FDA comes out with a new warning about how a different painkiller increases the risk of heart disease. Maybe they should stop using Dick Cheney as a subject in all of their drug trials

American Meals
American Airlines is now longer offering free food on most of its domestic flights. Most American passengers are reacting to the news with shock, saying: "That was food?"