China Balks
China is reconsidering loaning any money to Europe. The government realizes that if it wants to throw billions of dollars away on a bunch of flamboyantly dressed losers, it could just buy the New York Mets.




Keystone Cop Out
The Obama administration wants to delay its decision on allowing the Keystone oil pipeline until after next year's election... because while millions of Americans need jobs now, the White House really doesn't want to upset Darryl Hannah and Barbara Streissand.




CIA Watching Us
The AP reports that a large number of CIA agents are monitoring Facebook and Twitter. It's good to know they're taking a break from tracking down nukes in Iran so they can look at baby pictures and posts about belly button lint.



Tax Reversal
Senate Democrats have abandoned their demand for a new "millionaire's surtax." They are replacing that with something called the "campaign fundraising letter."



LSU Wins
In a rare #1 vs. #2 regular season college football battle, LSU beat Alabam 9 to 6. Incidentally, 9 and 6 were also both teams' average SAT scores.







November 7th


1893: Women in the U.S. state of Colorado are granted the right to vote... mostly because all the men were getting tired of sleeping outside.



1967: President Lyndon B. Johnson signs the Public Broadcasting Act of 1967, establishing a home for boring crap no other network would ever put on.



1983: A bomb explodes inside the United States Capitol. No people are harmed, but an estimated $250,000 in damage is caused when Congressman Charlie Rangel soils his custom-made pants.