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Top 10 Good Things About Being the Only Jew in Afghanistan

10) Nobody minds if you soak and salt the kosher meat in the Mikveh

9) Everyone assumes you're the funniest guy in the whole country

8) You're a shoo-in to be elected as the Afghan representative to the World Jewish Congress

7) Your day schools are safe from being criticized by Marvin Schick

6)Your Shabbat services are never disrupted by Kiddush clubs

5)As the only qualified mashgiach in the whole country, you'll be eating free for life

4) Even the local Anti-Semites have to be nice to you, or risk going out of business

3) The UJA sends YOU a check every month

2) You can safely eliminate those annoying responsive readings during the High Holiday services

1) Whenever you're accused of being selfish, you can just say: "Hey, I just have to do what's right for the Jewish community."