HUMOR BLOGGING THE WAR IN ISRAEL, Tuesday July 18th

Americans in Lebanon are being forced to pay for their evacuation by the U.S. Army. That's almost as crazy as making Americans pay for the war in Iraq.

Now two U.S. Senators are saying American evacuees won't have to pay... they'll just have to each leave a $50,000 deposit.

All the American evacuees say they're very relieved to be out of Lebanon... but when they get back to the 115-degree heat here in the U.S., they'll wish they were back in Beirut.

The U.N. is considering sending a peacekeeping forced to the Israeli-Lebanese border. Both the Israelis and Hezbollah are looking forward to shooting at someone else for awhile.

AND IN OTHER NEWS...

Stem Cell Veto
The White House says President Bush will veto the Senate's bill to expand stem cell research because "the president is not going to take something that is living and making it dead"... unless you're talking about the Constitution.

One-Eyed Ref
A Big Ten football referee with just one eye is filing a discrimination suit after the athletic conference fired him. Apparently, the Big Ten only wants refs with no eyes.

Cruise Accident
A cruise ship rolled sharply to one side off Port Canaveral, Florida today, injuring 37 passengers. That's the last time the kitchen crew serves the all-you-can eat afternoon buffet on one side the ship only.