WTO Failure
The World Trade Organization talks in Cancun, Mexico fell apart this weekend. Delegates say the meetings were derailed by agricultural and investment disagreements and the nightly wet T-shirt contest at Senor Frogs.


Arafat Options
Israeli leaders say they're not ruling out killing Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat as an option to improve the peace process. Other things the Israelis have been considering doing to Arafat:

-Pretending to be Arafat and have like 25 pizzas delivered to his Ramallah compound every night

-Making Arafat watch the next six days of TV coverage of the Ben Affleck/J. Lo split

-Sending him season tickets to the New York Jets

-Forcing him to go on the brutal, no pita, Middle Eastern Atkins Diet

-Informing the record companies about all his illegal music downloads


Ono Demonstration
Avant-garde icon Yoko Ono will repeat her legendary 1960s performance "Cut Piece" in Paris today, inviting the audience to destroy her clothing with scissors in the name of world peace. Experts say the event will do a lot more good if Ono allows the audience to destroy her music too.


Hacker Charged
22-year old computer hacker Adrian Lamo has been released on $250,000 bail and told to remain at his parents' home until his case is resolved. Lamo's lawyers are claiming victory, especially since Lamo was probably gonna be living at his parents' house for the next 10 years anyway.