Gay Ban Lifting
The good news is the U.S. government is about to allow openly gay people to serve in the military. The bad news is we can't afford to pay them.



White House Response
It's been two weeks since Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal asked the White House for help to fight the BP oil spill, and there's still no response. Jindal is getting so desperate to get President Obama's attention that he's going to hold a fundraiser for Barbara Boxer.



Recall Hearings
Congress is holding hearings today to look into the recalls for children's Tylenol. The nation needs answers because there's a growing number of five-year-olds who have nothing to take when they get a hangover.



Buick Marketing
GM is marketing it's new 2011 Buick Regal to a younger market than Buick's current target demographic. Actually, it has to do this, because the average Buick owner is 119 years old.



Super Bowl Preps
Now that the NFL has awarded the 2014 Super Bowl to the New York area, local businesses are scrambling to prepare. Hotels are putting together weekend packages, restaurants are taking special reservations, and millions of Pakistanis are looking for ways to charge $1,000 for a cab ride to stadium from Newark Airport.





May 27th


1937: The Golden Gate Bridge opens, giving suicidal Bay Area residents the opportunity of a lifetime.


1997: The U.S. Supreme Court rules that Paula Jones can pursue her sexual harassment lawsuit against President Bill Clinton while he is in office. Clinton is informed of the decision while in the act of sexually harassing women in his office.


1999: The International Criminal Tribunal indicts Slobodan Milošević for war crimes and crimes against local TV news anchors who embarrassed themselves for years mispronouncing his name.