JAKIE GOES HOLLYWOOD ALERT!!!

The ad campaign for "THANK YOU FOR SMOKING" is now in day SIX! Check out the brand new joke by clicking here: NYTimes.com

Everyone please do me a BIG favor and CLICK ON THE ADS for the movie! This will make it clear that the jokes and the ads caught your eye!

THANKS

BREAKING NEWS!!! A compromise deal has just been reached in the port deal controversy. The White House will still go ahead with the plan to sell the ports to an Arab company. But if there's a terrorist attack, the Bush administration has agreed to blame it on Hillary Clinton.

Knotts Dead
People everywhere are mourning the death of Don Knotts today. Knotts served as a powerful inspiration to hundreds of actors, millions of comics, and several members of the Bush administration.

Mardi Gras Returns
As usual, Mardi Gras craziness was evident this weekend in New Orleans. But this time, most of the local women going around topless just didn't have shirts to begin with.

Top 5 Signs You're Having a Bad Mardi Gras

5) Three days to go and you already look worse than the bathrooms in the Superdome

4) The only women willing to talk to you are from the Red Cross

3) You didn't get any beads because most of the locals are using them to build new homes

2) You got a great deal on a hotel room... in the lower 9th Ward

1) In the parade, you're riding on the FEMA float