Saturday, November 20, 2010

Toned Down TSA?
The TSA is now promising that airport security pat-downs will be less invasive than they have been... but still more invasive than a prostate exam.

Hillary on Terror
Hillary Clinton says she favors the death penalty for terrorists... but only if those terrorists are found guilty of mass murder, conspiracy to mass murder, or having sex with their interns.

Nurse Denial
A former male nurse has pleaded not guilty to charges of urging people to commit suicide. But he is admitting to telling patients that dying is easier than filling out most of their insurance forms.

Pope on Condoms
Pope Benedict XVI says male prostitutes should use condoms to help stop the spread of AIDS... and female prostitutes can help slow the spread of STD's simply by dropping out of Georgetown.

Stem Cells in CA
California's state stem cell agency wants more time and money... mostly in hopes of getting out of California.

November 22nd

1935: The China Clipper takes off from Alameda, California for its first commercial flight. It reaches its destination, Manila, a week later… making it still faster than the daily La Guardia to O’Hare flight on United.

1954: The Humane Society of the United States is founded, mostly in hopes of curbing the escalating violence between Tom and Jerry.

1975: Juan Carlos is declared King of Spain following the death of Francisco Franco and the lack of anyone else interested in the job.


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