Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Green Dream
A new study shows that 95% of the products that claim to be "green" really aren't... that includes 100% of Democratic candidates.

Soros for Pot
George Soros is strongly supporting efforts to legalize marijuana... which would explain his $17 billion investment in Cheetos.

Chavez's Latest Grab
Dictator Hugo Chavez is taking over an American glass company that operates in Venezuela. It was either that or invest in Sean Penn's next crappy movie.

Obama Comment
President Obama seems to have invoked a civil rights slur when he said yesterday that Republicans "need to sit in the back." I guess he was only talking about Juan Williams.

Alzheimer's and Smokes
A new study shows that smoking doubles your chances to get Alzheimer's... something the cigarette companies are counting on as their best customers keep forgetting the surgeon general's warnings.

October 26th

1977: Thanks to vaccinations, the last natural case of smallpox is discovered and eradicated in Somalia. Somalia remains smallpox free, because nobody there understands the crap Jenny McCarthy is saying.

1979: Park Chung-hee, President of South Korea is assassinated by Kim Jae-kyu, in a desperate battle over the dwindling number of available hyphens.

1995: Israeli Mossad agents assassinate Islamic Jihad leader Fathi Shikaki in his hotel in Malta… leaving the management without anyone to bill for Shikaki’s huge bill for all the dirty movies he ordered on Spectravision.


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