Thursday, March 03, 2011

BYU Player Booted
BYU has kicked one of its star players off the basketball team because he had sex with his girlfriend. That's opposed to Arizona State, where you don't even get kicked off the team for having sex with the coach's girlfriend.

End of the World Prediction
Researchers at UC Berkeley say there's a good chance most of the world's living creatures will be extinct within three generations. Of course, that's great news for the future of Social Security!

Gun Registry
Connecticut may soon require all convicted gun offenders to register where they live with law enforcement authorities. Of course that registry already exists, it's called the UConn football roster.

Dog Fighting Ring Found
Sheriff's deputies have uncovered a massive dog fighting ring just outside Los Angeles. So, it looks like Michael Vick is going to keep busy during that NFL lockout!

Moore on Money
Michael Moore says rich people's money is a natural resource that everyone should share. Too bad he doesn't feel the same way about his 500 boxes of Ho-Ho's.

March 3rd

1873: Congress enacts the Comstock Law, making it illegal to send any "obscene, lewd, or lascivious" books through the mail. Most Congressmen at that time preferred that stuff hand delivered anyway.

1931: The United States officially adopts The Star-Spangled Banner as its national anthem… narrowly choosing it over Dr. Dre’s “Bitches Ain’t Sh*t.”

1991: 74% of the population of Latvia votes for independence from the Soviet Union. The other 26% just really, really liked standing in line.


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