Thursday, June 17, 2010

Stimulus Milestone
President Obama heads to Ohio today to dedicate the 10,000th road project created by the stimulus. Unfortunately, all the projects are on the same road.

Missing Afghan Troops
17 Afghan troops who were receiving pilot and English lessons at a U.S. Air Force have gone missing. It's not clear if they're AWOL or if they were just scheduled on a flight with Spirit Airlines.

Oprah Gifts
Oprah Winfrey gave all the staffers at her "O" magazine a $10,000 check and a free iPad. The employees will use the iPad to surf the web, and the $10,000 to amuse themselves while they wait out the AT&T service outages.

Quality Cars
For the first time ever, American cars have edged out foreign cars in the J.D. Power & Associates quality study. And that's a good thing since more Americans are now living in their cars.

New Odyssey
Honda has unveiled its new Odyssey minivan. It comes with four-wheel drive, DVD players, and supplemental estrogen injections.

June 18th

1767: Samuel Wallis, an English sea captain, sights Tahiti and is immediately inspired to invent the thong bikini.

1778: British troops abandon Philadelphia, Pennsylvania... the rest of America has been stuck with it ever since.

1930: Groundbreaking ceremonies for the Franklin Institute are held. The event is marred by thousands of collectibles idiots who think it's the opening ceremonies for the Franklin Mint.

1996: Ted Kaczynski, suspected of being the Unabomber, is indicted on ten criminal counts. And sued by 11 barbers across the country.


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