Tuesday, March 09, 2010

Haim Dead
Former child actor Corey Haim has died. The two biggest questions are what caused his death and who's going to cover his shift at Taco Bell.

Teflon Toyota
Despite all the recalls, Toyota's sales are up 50% so far this month. The company is doing especially well among gamblers, sky divers, and men who have been married twice.

B of A Overdrafts
Bank of America is now blocking its customers debit cards from spending more money than they have in their accounts. Unfortunately, Bank of America does not issue those cards to Congress.

Sheen Return
Charlie Sheen says he plans to return to "2 and a Half Men" as soon as he gets out of rehab... which will force the rest of the nation to enter rehab.

Cromartie's Record
New Jets defensive back Antonio Cromartie has seven children with six different women in five states. If he covers wide receivers like he covers the fertile women in America, the Jets are going to the Super Bowl!

March 10th

1762: French Huguenot Jean Calas, who was wrongly convicted of killing his son, dies after being tortured by authorities. Had this incident occurred today, he would die after trying to pay his legal fees.

1831: The French Foreign Legion is established by King Louis-Philippe to support his war in Algeria and give gay men a place to go.

1876: Alexander Graham Bell makes the first successful telephone call by saying "Mr. Watson, come here, I want to see you." Then it got weird when Bell asked him what he was wearing.


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